Don't

In the name of Allah, the one I always turn to.


I need to stop thinking about the people who never bothered thinking about me.
I need to forget the people who forget about me.
I need to let go of the people who has let go of me.


Was it because I grew up playing alone that I turned out to be so inexpressive? 
When people leave me, I couldn't seem to say a word to try to stop them or just tell them how I feel.
All I know is that it's hurting me so bad and I wanted to say so many things out loud, but I always find myself screaming in the inside.
Never, ever, ever on the outside.
Everytime I got lucky enough to have someone by my side ready to listen to me,
all I ever did was cry.
No words can come out of my mouth.
Now I wish to write it down, or shall I say, type it out.
Or, shall I say, I'm trying to.
I don't want you to go. I might be able to live without you, but I really really don't want to.
I don't want you to forget about me, especially because you promised you wouldn't.
Call me pathetic but I wait everyday for at least a text from you.
And when you text me, I get so afraid that you would stop texting me again one day.
Call me pathetic all you want but while I'm typing this out, there are only 2 people on my mind,
the 2 people to whom these words are supposed to be said out loud.
One; my bestfriend. Two; my better half.
And yet, so much more are left unable to be said.


You should've known better.