one day, soon.

In the name of Allah, the only one I turn to, every single time.

I'm sorry each post has been about the same old thing, well I wish I can stop wishing on this, and talking about it, the thing is it's getting harder every bloody damn time to get this thing off my mind. All the memories for the past decade seem to come haunting me back. I'm trying, I still am, I won't give up just yet because I've been into this for a while now and I believe my efforts are going to be worth this thing I'm fighting for, and my struggle won't be in vain this time, not this time, everything IS going to be a lot better soon. I can hear my phone rings and you're at the other end, I can hear my phone rings and your name appears on the screen, it's going to happen, it IS going to happen soon, Insyaallah, Allah is Most Merciful, Most Gracious, He listens to my prayers everyday because He's the only One who would listen to me, one day soon I won't have to fake my smiles any longer and my cheeks are going to hurt everyday for constantly smiling and laughing. One day, I won't even need my chocolates anymore because he's going to be there to comfort me, make me happy effortlessly as he used to do. One day, everyone I love will be happy again. One day, soon, He will fulfill my prayers, all of my prayers, I believe He will. And when that day comes, I never want to go another day for I fear things are going to change again, let it stop there for me, let my time stop right there, let it all be my last memories, the memories that'll stick to my mind till the hereafter; if I were destined for hell (God forbids), let me burn with those sweetest memories for they will remind me to be very very grateful for what I've had, and if I'm destined for heaven, let the memories live with me for eternity. I believe soon it's my turn. I'm next in line, He will attend to my wishes very soon :'( I'll keep believing. 

To believe is free anyway :)