all attached

In the name of Allah, the one and my only.

You know what's even more pathetic?
...being left with no memories at all about the most important, most precious person in your life.

All I had was a picture or two of my late grandma, my bestest friend.
Sometimes I'd watch Lion King simply cuz I miss having her with me.
We used to watch that all the time when I was small and still pretty lovable.
Now that I miss her, I ask myself, is that all there is?

Then as I started writing this, I remember.
I might not have a whole photo album full with her pictures.
I might have nothing much left that reminds me of the good, old times.
But deep in my heart, in my head, everything's playing like a playback. Over and over.
Every single day as an episode of its own.
Every single memory so vividly, being retold.
Every single detail.
And the last days I spent with her, before she left.
It's not physical, but it's embedded in me.
And nothing can ever replace that.

Just like when I'm missing you just too much
and I realize I've gotten rid of all our pictures that I had.
Little that I know it's as easy as closing my eyes, and there it is.
The most perfect pictures of you, the most perfect picture of us.
All I need to do is to close my eyes and suddenly there isn't any distance between us.
Just you. And I.
So far, in reality, but so close, closer than we'd ever known.
And although I can't hear your voice and  you can't hear mine,
I believe our hearts listen to one another, no matter where we are.
I just pray Allah will always protect you, give you strength to go through each day,
and give you good health and happiness all the way.

imy